The words Merry and Happy are used throughout the holiday season. For those who have lost loved ones these words can be hollow and even painful because of their all too fresh feelings of grief and loss. They are feeling anything but Merry and Happy.
If you have or know someone who has lost a loved one this year and is struggling with their feelings of “celebrating” the holidays without them, here are seven suggestions for relieving the grieving during this festive time of year.
- Be gentle with yourself. You may not get as much accomplished as you’d like. You may not be able to cook, entertain or shop. Go slow. Be kind to yourself. Lower your expectations. You are in pain and most of your energy is needed to deal with the grief.
- Listen to your body and your emotions. Trying to ignore your body and your emotions during the holidays seldom works. To get your attention, your body may simply shut down, making you physically ill. This can happen even if your issues are mainly emotional in nature. Check in with your emotions and use EFT/Tapping to help ease the intensity.
- Seek out activities and people that lift your spirits. This may include good friends and family members that you feel comfortable around and going to Christmas light displays, ice skating rinks or other activities that you can do with a close friend or family member.
- Don’t overextend emotionally or physically. You may not have as much emotional or physical energy as usually. Be kind to yourself. It’s okay for you to be on the receiving end of having things done for you. Set boundaries on how much cooking, shopping or entertaining you will do and don’t be afraid to say “no” to invitations.
- Volunteer or help someone in need. When we shift our focus away from ourselves, we have less time to dwell on our grief and helping others can lift your spirits and give you a feeling of purpose and a job well done. Volunteering opportunities abound during the holidays and can be found at churches, soup kitchens, schools, and homeless shelters.
- Reflect on the holidays you shared with your deceased loved one. You can honor the memory of a loved one by remembering them during the holidays. Give thanks for the times you shared. Get out photos, play music, prepare foods that they enjoyed and find the joy in the time you spent together.
- Ask for help. Don’t be afraid to ask for help with how you are feeling. Ask a friend or family member if they would just listen while you talk. You may also want to reach out for more support from a professional counselor orprofessional counselor or EFT/Tapping coach to help ease the intensity of your grief and loss.
Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT also known as Tapping) is a useful tool you can use to help you cope with feelings of grief and loss during the holidays or any time. EFT is an energy psychology method designed to help you process emotions and reprogram your body’s reactions related to them. While lightly tapping on key acupuncture meridian points, EFT stimulates your body’s energy meridians which releases trapped emotions and the mental and physical pain associated with them.
It takes minutes to learn the technique and it can be used whenever grief surfaces whether you are alone or at a gathering. EFT is simple, painless and works quickly to reduce emotional intensity.
If you are feeling that you, or someone you know, needs help this holiday season, please contact me for a free, 15-minute consultation to learn how EFT can help you put the Merry and Happy back in your life.
Merry Christmas, Happy New Year and the Best of Holidays to you.
Wishing you wellness,
Wellness Coach, EFT and Matrix Imprinting coach